Maybe people should stop telling other people how to live their lives. I get asked a lot about when I am going to have anther child.. it really does irritate me. I know that people for the most part mean well and I can understand that but I always feel like people are projecting themselves on me.
I am perfectly happy with my one child, most days I don’t see the need to have another. Parenting is hard as I’ve said before and anyone who makes it look that easy is really faking-it-til-they-make-it kind of deal. It’s hard for me anyway. I don’t believe I should have another kid because my son needs a sibling. I also don’t believe I should have another kid because my boyfriend doesn’t have any.. although I really do consider it because it’d be a beautiful thing. The thing is that this child will be MY responsibility, mothers are the ones who make most of the sacrifices. Most of the time it isn’t a big deal and we do it happily BUT there are times we feel it. We see it; we live it.
What I am trying to say is that I am not going to have another child for anyone other than ME. Does that sound selfish? Maybe it is, but I get to be selfish. It’s my body and my life. People also make it sound so easy as if bringing another life form into the world is anything but easy? Children don’t just have monetary needs, they have physical needs. They need time dedicated to them, love, support, the list is never ending. I don’t take this lightly and it really does bother me that other people seem to do so.
I don’t project my things onto other people, I am not sure why people project theirs onto me. I’ve struggled with this for some time and ultimately feel that at this present time, I don’t want another child. My son was a HUGE surprise and so if I’d consider having another child, it’d be something I’m ready for.
I know we all struggle with the could, woulda, shoulda and maybe that’s okay. I guess I still have some time left to determine whether or not I fully want another one. Until then, I’ll happily watch mine grow and grow with him along the way.
Ps. What are some things people project on you? How does it make you feel?